Thoughts from the Board - Allison Esser

Some of you know that I had twins in January after a difficult pregnancy. I was put on bed rest at 25 weeks, admitted to the hospital at 29 weeks, and delivered the twins at 34 weeks. The twins both weighed under 5 pounds and had to stay in the NICU for several weeks. Baby A spent time in an incubator to regulate temperature and Baby B needed support breathing. This was not the pregnancy or birth experience that I wanted. I have felt a lot of grief over the loss of certain moments – instead of holding my babies immediately after their birth I got a quick look at them before they were handed to a team of waiting nurses. I read an article by another mom of twin preemies who said if she could go back in time, she would tell herself “they will smile late, but once they smile they will smile all the time.” This quote gave me a lot of strength in the early months. Things do not always happen as we expect or want them to, but that doesn’t mean we can’t still find moments of joy or hold out hope. Time in the NICU was hard, but it meant we got to cheer the babies on for every ounce they gained and take pride in how quickly they learned to eat, exceeding the doctor’s expectations. Eight months later it’s hard to recognize that these smiling, crawling, opinionated babies are the same babies that needed so much support early on. Members of the legal community take on a tremendous amount of work which can feel overwhelming in the moment. I hope we all take time to remember what motivated us to do this work and find joy, inspiration and connection where we can. I am also so appreciative of all the help and support my family received from the Weld County legal community through letters, shared stories, food and help at work. I hope in difficult times people recognize what a supportive community we are part of and feel comfortable reaching out for help whether that be getting coverage to take a day off, brainstorming a difficult issue, or having someone to talk to after a rough day. I hope everybody had a good summer break. I’m looking forward to reconnecting with everybody soon as we resume our monthly meetings! --- Allison Esser